Presently, the idea seems to be that I should be an oregano-based life form. I’ve had a cough for almost two months, and since my wife can’t get me to act with modern impatience and trot off worriedly to the doctor, she thinks that if I can become somehow dependent on oregano oil, I’ll not be afflicted. So she made capsules filled with oregano oil that I have to take.
She has a point. I know of no oregano-based life forms that have a cough.
The only thing worse than taking pills is going to the doctor, so I take the pills in order not to see the doctor. She fondly imagines it is working, all the while my extraordinary constitution, not weakened by constant reliance on modern medicine, works against both the undoccumented pernicious effects of excessive oregano oil intake, and whatever it is lodged in my chest I am grinding to a pulp at my own steady pace.