What Would I Do?

I have been thinking about what I would do if I don’t stay here. There is a good chance, as I am not willing to live on the kind of salary a Colombian pastor would be willing to live on that they’ll reconsider. There are a few factors: for them to visit family it might cost 200k pesos for two, for me to visit family we are looking at 3million pesos for two, with cheap tickets. A Colombian can live in neighborhoods it is not advisable foreigners do, and as a result cheaper. I was talking to a missionary and he asked me if I wasn’t willing to make the sacrifice. I had no trouble saying no. We are quite sure we aren’t willing. Not been called, can see other solution to their situation, what would be the point of sacrificing without a real, compelling motive? We’ve tried it for long enough to be sure. We do not want to keep living here if it means we keep drawing on our savings which after a couple of years and even a stimulus package or two have dwindled.

So what would I do? I joked with Katrina that I’d be a chaplain in the military. Turns out the Navy has something on an online search thing for an opening somehow associated with St. Paul, MN. At this point, shouldn’t I get a job that has to do with what I studied? One of the things that’s been easiest for me here is talking to young men–they’re so ignorant you don’t have to know much to talk to them. The cons are the discipline and leaving the family behind. Can I handle the discipline? And the wife? But then I can just send her to visit all her friends and family when I’m away. Or just do the Air Force and not be away that much?

Another option would be to return to the academy, providing I could get myself into a Ph.D. program. Theology and probably systematic, it would be, though maybe history or historical. I’m really not prepared for higher study of other things, at this point. I was looking at Paul Helm there in London. Wouldn’t that be keen? With the Metropolitan Tabernacle and all. Not sure how one would pay for it, but an interesting possibility. Not sure about programs in the USA. Looked up Beeson to see if old Dr. Bray, who wrote an excellent book I just read, did, but saw they don’t do Ph.D’s. Looked up the Edinburgh, Scotland faculty and found a chap all into phenomenology. Could I stand that? Could I stand the academy? There is such a deadness I always feel in the kind of people you encounter there. You think you’re going to run into Dorothy Sayers and C.S. Lewis and civilized people who drink tea, but what do you get?

Or get a real job and plod on that way, scratching away furtively at the SF–just got two more rejections this week. It keeps improving there, and I just need to persevere, but I think I have to do something while I persevere which needs to be long-term.

One thing is almost certain, I’ll try avoiding returning to teaching basic English very much. And I don’t see other possibilities here.

Or they might decide to pay me more and keep me. That is still on the cards.

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