Colombian Hot Dog

What is the main ingredient in a Colombian hot dog?

You might think the meat is, but if you thought that you would be wrong because the main ingredient is the bun. Now in a regular hot dog the bun functions as an eatable napkin. It is there to hold the main part with and has the added value of maintaining the condiments for an evenly distributed eating-experience.

In a Colombian hot dog the bun functions that second way as well. What else would keep the pink sauce on the meat, not to mention whatever else they add: sautéed onions, sugar-based red sauce known as tomato sauce with little of the tomato recognizable therein, the shoe-string fries and of course, the two quails eggs, though these can be attached with toothpicks and perhaps are no part of the services the bun offers. But returning to the bun, unless the thing is large enough–say twice the mass of the actual dog–it might have a circumference lesser than that of your mouth, which would mean you are getting ripped off. Besides, the increased surface area allows for about a regular package of potato-chips-worth of the shoe-string fries to go on top for an evenly distributed eating-experience . . . in which the dog is another condiment for the bun.

It does not make for great table manners, but Colombians in general do things that in other places might not be considered great table manners anyway. Which reminds me they always have their hamburgers in a little box, as they do their hot dogs.

Of course you need a little box, the whole thing is unmanageable otherwise. What else I have learned is that if you order it without the sauces–no sauces? and their eyes go round–it is a lot more agreeable. I don’t know who came down here and made all their sauces abominable, but someone must have. Mine just now–hot dog, that is–was just BUN, hot dog, ham, cheese, the shoe-string fries and, of course, two quail’s eggs. It was a simple version of a hot dog, actually.

Not sure yet why quail’s eggs are such an integral part of fast food here.

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